Even as a 5 year old I wanted to be perfect. I can vividly remember sitting on the schoolbus and thinking to myself "I'm going to be really good today...I want to be perfect...I dont want to be bad." I wish I could sit down next to that curly haired-crazy girl put my arm around her and whisper in her ear..."Oh but you are. You're are His princess..his prized possesion because of His son Jesus."
But even today I am still competing with those thoughts of perfection. "if I go to church today will he love me more?" "if I teach this study I am far better off than that person" "I read my bible today I can check that box off." Those thoughts are so common yet so wrong. It is is not far fetched to say that we are all built this way..."If I do this I can get this"..."If I walk down this aisle and write my name on a card I can receive my get out of hell free card" I grew up with this way of thinking. I am so thankful for the church I grew up in. I love the fact that I learned the name Jesus from that church. I took away beautiful friendships from that church, but what I didn't take away from that church is that I couldn't earn my salvation.
As a 32 year old woman looking back on my life so far I wouldn't change a thing because it is my story. God's sovereign plan for me. His plan for me continues... The first thing revealed to me was that the ten commandments were not just a bunch of rules that YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW... He lived the life we couldnt live, died the death we should have died, and arose defeating death so that when the Father looks at us He sees perfection! I'm perfect in Christ and declared righteous because of His work on the cross. Romans 3:21-30. That makes me take a deep breath and let out a BIG sigh of relief. It isn't about me...never was. As humans it is so hard for us to let go of the mindset of working and giving God a big list of things we did on the day we stand before him. Matthew 7:22
When we live in accordance to His will we will in fact do those things and not even know it. Matthew 25:35.
Does this mean we are sinless once we understand the fullness of what Christ did for us? No! Does this mean that we can just sin because God will always see us as perfect and forgive us? Paul says may it never be! The ten commandments-the law of God reveals our sin and shows us our need for a savior. It magnifies the life of Christ and our need for relationship with Him.
Romans 7:7-25 We still live in the flesh, but come to God confessing/realizing the depth and darkness of our sin in turn asking God to mortify that sin. This is called repentance. Turning away from our sin and looking to Christ for strength to overcome it.
More good news...therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.
Paul goes on to say while here on planet earth we will always be confronted with our sinful nature-God promises here that we can overcome our sinful nature because of the spirit of Christ in us! How awesome is that?? So I can say with confidence to that 5 year old little girl on the schoolbus... yes, there are going to be some bumps in the road and some heartache. You will not make wise decisions, but always remember that you are constantly being perfected in Him. You are his treasure.
